Oh sad day, my jury service is over. I have a final extract before the prosecution rested:
Defendant: I didn't hear anything, I wasn't even home.
Now back to the grindstone. Have some IT work this morning, but that is followed by lunch at The National theatre, which is rather exciting!
Then, I have my critique of Sequestration Manor back from Philip Shelley. On the first read, he isn't as brutal as Raindance! Haven't digested it fully yet, but there are a lot of changes. LOTS and lots! After a full read, I shall decide if I prefer the cut and thrust of Raindance over Screenwriting Goldmine's softer approach, but I suspect they're are actually both as brutal!
Does that change? As one gets better, do the Draft 1 critiques get less abrasive?
I'm going to have to do it - it's solid gold!
Today's extracts (which can't be discussed for fear of influencing me, but can surely be mentioned?)
Prosecution: You didn't know there were illegal items in your flat?
Prosecution: You did know?
Prosecution: You didn't know?
Prosecution: Do you mean No?
Prosecution: Yes or No?
The judge interrupted at that point - AND told off Mr Barrister off for having his hands in his pockets
So, strictly confidential these next couple of weeks - and rather nice it is too.
I can't work, I have to move into court and listen, get sent outside to chat or read, then be fetched back in again. It is a lovely opportunity to step away from writing (and computers) completely. A chance to let new ideas germinate and distance myself from old ideas before my final edit of Red Star and its voyage to Agents requesting a view of my work.
Meanwhile, I'm relishing the experience. Courts in the UK, at least Crown Courts, still seem to be frightfully smart.
The case (NO DETAILS!) is full of video footage and statements, the latter read out by the terribly upper class:
Defense Barrister: ".Fuck you"
Judge: "What did you say?"
DB: "I said, Fuck you, My Lord."
Judge: "I see, thank you."
I shall be sad to get back to the real world.
I love Christmas, but isn't it a bit early?
Yesterday, had 3 kids for tea, singing vaguely recognisable Christmas carols, with alternate wording, whilst drawing vampire-cyclops-bats.
Had the local turning on of the Christmas lights last week - complete with local schools and lanterns - and my daughter is nagging me to put up decorations.
The only thing is to give in, and enjoy the moment... hours ... weeks - whatever. That also justifies opening some port, in my opinion, a truly seasonal drink.
That should help me tackle Red Star too. Got back the review from Raindance and it isn't pretty. A HELL of a lot needed changing as I have to agree with all the comments. Minus writing groups or impartial friends who work with scripts for a living (!), getting a critique is crucial - to me anyway. The PROBLEM is again I've left it too late! I submitted the script to the Channel 4 program before the review, and I've gotta say it's highly unlikely to impress in that version! Hey-ho, there's always next year and I'm nearly done with the re-writes.
I've also sent Sequestration Manor for a review, trying a new source - Phillip Shelley at The Script Consultant. Will he be as surgical?
for samples of my work